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I’m Still Here…On the Road
Right now, I am sitting in the Escape Pod, next to a lake in Alabama. My husband and I really did buy a small RV (Van on steroids) and leave our home and jobs behind for a year on the road. We hit our six month trip anniversary a couple of weeks ago and I thought it was about time I published a post. I’ve written very little since we started and published even less, so this will be a catch up. This trip has had plenty of ups and downs, starting before we even left home. In the weeks leading up to our launch, I had a bike accident…
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Choosing Happiness
I am no stranger to the fact that life does not go according to plan. It almost never does. But that isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes it is better than we could imagine and sometimes it is awful, but most of the time it just IS. When I was 13, I wanted to be a basketball player. I was a decent athlete, I probably could have played college ball, but I’d never have made it into the WNBA even if it had existed back in the day. A motorcycle accident when I was 14 years old put an end to that dream. So after some difficult teen years, I…
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Life Four Years After Groundhog Day
Four years ago today, I received the stunning phone call from my doctor. It feels like yesterday and yet an eternity ago. I thought I had a thyroid problem. This. Was. Not. What. I. Expected. These past four years have also not been what I expected. I am shocked at how my life has changed since then. I am shocked at how I’VE changed since then, and not just in a physical sense. And most definitely not just in a negative way. As a person with an autoimmune disease, I have evolved a lot. Last year I wrote a post about the three year mark and never published it. Upon…
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The Last Straw Pt. 1
I am broken. In my last post, I said it’s time to get real. I’m not proud of feeling this way, nor am I comfortable with it. But it’s real. I feel broken…physically and spiritually. The title of my blog is “Life After Groundhog Day” because I wanted to document how life evolves after a moment – for me, being diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder. No, it’s not cancer, but it’s not nothing either. The past two and a half years have been so hard. So hard that I have found myself thinking things that are difficult for me to admit to myself, let alone to a public audience. The…
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Getting Real
Two years after Groundhog Day. I am a fraud. I’ve been dishonest and it’s time to get real. I write in a journal fairly often, but not consistently. Since starting my blog about 18 months ago I’ve published six posts. I’ve written a few more that I didn’t want to publish for one reason or another. I started this blog to put my thoughts down but also to get some hope out there about Rheumatoid Disease (RD or Rheumatoid Arthritis – RA). In my first post, “I’m Comin’ Out” I wrote something I still get and believe, but that I’d like to discuss again. I said that I had found…
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One Year After Groundhog Day
Anniversaries. We celebrate the good ones and we grieve the bad. On the anniversary of my Dad’s death every year, it’s like I am experiencing that awful day all over again. I hate it. I wish I could forget that day and the month leading up to it, but I can’t. Every year, it feels like it just happened, yet like it was a lifetime ago. I’m not sure I understand the power an anniversary holds. But it does. Last week, on Groundhog Day, another powerful anniversary arrived. The one year anniversary of my R.A. diagnosis. It did not hold the power of a death’s anniversary, but it was definitely…
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Musical Therapy
Music is really important to me. I LOVE music! I have loved it for as long as I can remember. When I was a little girl, growing up in Colorado, I was infatuated with John Denver. In 6th grade, I was obsessed with Michael Jackson. Later, it was Prince, then Def Leppard, Nirvana and many others. As an adult I discovered Kenny Chesney, who got me through my husband’s 2nd deployment to Iraq. I can sit and listen to music for hours. It is meditative and it helps me cope. I, personally, have NO musical talent, but I live my life with a constant background playlist. Kenny Chesney’s song, “I…
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Me, Running and God 2.0
It’s fine, I ran today. It hurt a little but it also felt AMAZING. I ran a 5k last Saturday. It hurt a LOT, and it felt AMAZING. I am attempting to make running a regular part of my life again. I have my rheumatologist’s blessing in trying. It’s not going as well as I’d like, but I’m not giving up. I have an appointment next week to discuss my goals and treatment options I’ve been avoiding up until now. I am contemplating additional medications to combat some new symptoms and maybe help with my goal to run. I’ll let you know how it goes. In the meantime, below you…
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Power Struggles
I must admit that I am a control freak. I have learned, in certain areas of my life, to let go of that a bit. Kindergarten, for example, is no place for someone who seeks to control. The past eight years would have driven me insane had I not let go of my need to control everything. Have you ever spent time in a class of 4-6 year olds in August? There is no controlling that. In my personal life, however, I have always sought control. Some of my greatest accomplishments have been a direct result of this trait – earning two bachelor’s degrees, running a marathon. I like to…
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I Can’t Even
I can’t do it. I just can’t. Not right now. I’ve tried, but it is just not in me right now. What am I struggling with? School. I’ve taught kindergarten for eight years and this is the FIRST time that, at this point in the summer, my classroom has not been re-organized and my next year plans have not been started. I haven’t even cleaned out my binder yet. I “tore down” my room according to my school’s policy, took my shit home and haven’t looked back. I am one solid month into summer and I’ve done almost nothing. I did weed through a TON of emails a few weeks…
